Where am I ? (Part 1)

Questioner: There is a questioning inside, that ‘ Where am I? ‘ But I can also see this is the questioning of the one that has an idea of a place to be achieved.

Rajee: Yes, It is like this. For some time that we live in a kind of a mix of two states, which is not only sometime this, sometime that, but even at the same time it is like a mix of two also. And this is where there is a assurance from the truer space that all is well and from the not-so-true space a confusion that ‘Should I do something about it or would it be moving prematurely?’

I want to just share with you in the most simple and fundamental way – That which does not move inside you, is not affected by any movement whatsoever that happens inside you, any experience that happens inside you, and it is not even affected by the experience of bondage from which you are trying to be free.

And so obviously that part, that aspect of your self is least bothered about anything that is going on here, in one sense. So it must be this changeful aspect of you which is concerned about waking up, maintaining the awakened state or clarity, peacefulness, and making sure that I am not falling in the trap again. But in this changeful aspect, when taken as your only reality, will only live as a separate isolated identity from rest of life and from your own deeper aspect also.

(Excerpts from Focus Group Meeting, 30th July, 2017)

Let’s Wonder Together.

Are you not able to sense some kind of spaciousness like a sky, like a inner sky in which everything is happening right now? It has to happen in some kind of space. What is that space in which everything is happening? Don’t think, don’t imagine, don’t question, only wonder with me, let’s wonder together.

We are just wondering together. And this ‘wondering’ can stop your ‘Wandering’.

An Invitation to explore Truth of this moment

May I invite all of you right now just for five minutes, to explore the Truth together like this? And let me express what I mean by Truth. Truth means This, what is here right now, including everything, including your body, your mind, your thinking, your certain way of thinking, your certain states of comfort or discomfort, a certain desire that I want to be free, all of this together is Truth, no? And if you notice, everything that you are seeing is changing somehow, slowly or quickly. Speed is what matters, what differs, otherwise everything is changing. And this is the Truth of this moment that everything is changing. If you want to know the Truth of life, know the Truth of this moment first. What is the Truth of this moment? Everything that is present inside you is Truth, Truth of this moment. And if you are in search of Truth of this moment why would you change anything inside you, why would you like to change anything, touch anything, improve anything in any way? You will leave everything totally as it is, hundred percent everything is left as it is. Like there is no weight you are putting on anything, not insisting in any way, not demanding anything in any way right now. Everything is so very much allowed or left alone in a way. So this is the Truth of this moment that everything is like a process, like everything is in process. Kind of changing slowly, slowly, slowly. And I want to tell you beloved, it’s a great discovery. This comfortableness with everything that is here right now is the key to discover That which is not changing. You cannot force yourself to discover what is not changing inside you. But you can wisely, out of wisdom, you can let go of your fight with anything and everything that is here right now, that it doesn’t really bring that clarity and that freedom, absolute freedom. So for few minutes I stop fighting with everything that is inside me. Let everything be the way it is.

(Excerpts from Focus Group Meetings 30th July, 2018)

When you find yourself in a no-man’s land

Satsang is essential for you now because maybe not very often but quite often I feel you might find yourself in a no-man’s land where you are not interested in talking of the mind and discussion or anything and yet you don’t have kind of access to your Self so easily, to the peacefulness, to the real peacefulness, or aliveness of your Self where you kind of feel excited like a child, peaceful but excited also. Like peaceful and celebrating, peacefully your Self. So then satsang is vital for you because generally you are done with the mind, mind has nothing to offer to you now, whether it is spiritual achievement or worldly and yet you may keep holding onto this kind of nothing that you have here like a dead nothingness, dead emptiness. And satsang can very quickly bring you to your natural state where you are empty but very alive and you are nothing but very much like a very alive nothing. Strange word actually, strange term but it is true. Actually you are super happy in being nothing and nobody. Like this we can make sure that mind stands no chance, it cannot create any confusions inside you which you can buy sometime.

So satsang is essential for you.
As I said satsang in the form of this meeting or satsang of your own. If you can connect with your own spaciousness and aliveness.

(Excerpts from Focus Group, 26th July, 2018)

Opening up in Satsang

Questioner: I just would like to come forward and meet, because there’s this little bit nervousness to come forward and speak, because there’s this feeling, ‘I don’t have anything to say and if to come forward and meet I have think about something to say’. This makes me a little bit uneasy, thank you.

Rajee – I feel like this, all the fear, all the hesitation, all the sense of, kind of inferiority or anything like this which stops us from opening up and connecting is ego, no? So not opening up is ego, opening up is your natural state, no? Like this. But whenever we try to open up outward, meaning to someone who is living in the personal space or state of consciousness, we kind of feel like we are filled by their feelings or emotions or energies and things like this. It looks like not a nice experience generally, and in the spiritual sense it is true also, up to some degree. So this is why you are invited to come to satsang and open up here. Because satsang is not a person but the very space, very presence of life, presence of existence. Very highlighted, it’s like very highlighted, like dominant, it’s very dominant here. And the mind and the personal tendencies are very low and kind of don’t exist basically in the light of satsang. So it’s all about opening up. Whenever you feel like this open up, that’s all, that’s all. It’s never about achieving anything because nothing can be added to you. Even if it was possible, it will be worthless compared to what you are already. You are this pure existence which is so very undivided and originally so that there is no gap for any quality to enter except its own inherent quality of being empty, present, silent, peaceful. So in the ultimate sense of waking up, all that you have to do is open up, open up, open up in the right environment, I would say the right environment is this togetherness of satsang, where no personal mind is working or trying to achieve anything.

In satsang you open up like this by encountering the Truth. The satsang, highest possibility in the satsang is encounter with the Truth. For no other reason just you want to face the Truth. And the process is – Open up, meaning, the process is that you feel kind of closed for some reason, like it’s just you can sense somehow very quickly or very clearly as you have sensed just now that it’s little bit like this, ‘OK, I will just come forward and ..’ You just want to be your Self now. You don’t want to achieve anything. So this is the Being which is asking this question or coming forward like this. It’s just so wonderful actually. Then I don’t have to teach you anything. You don’t have to learn also anything. And we just have to meet like this for some time until necessary. So that I can present my Self and offer my stillness as the mirror to you so that you can clearly see who you are. Satsang is that environment in which it becomes very, very simple and kind of very comfortable or easy also to kind of feel your Self when you are interested. Satsang is not really a place for growth or achievement of any sort in a spiritual way. It is a place to kind of acknowledge and value your Self. You are encouraged somehow.

What do you feel?

Questioner: Yes, I feel very much encouraged to open up and I feel this past few satsangs is really beautiful because I’m really in ‘This’, and not much discussion. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you

(Excerpts from Online Focus Group, 26th July, 2018)

Connected to the very fire of This-ness

Questioner: Hello, I have nothing to say, actually just no-one else was speaking so, I just clicked the button.

Rajee – Oh, yes, yes it’s nice. Because this is the highest possibility here, interaction, like this. Interaction not so much for solving anything or asking a question but more like – I just want to be online or how to say, connected to the very fire of This-ness. It’s really very valuable when it is done without any intention. Because then, it is basically coming from the very depth of your Self. Because ego is very happy when it has achieved some kind of sense of presence – little bit of a sense of understanding that ‘OK, this is what is happening today and I am doing well’. But the Being that you are, wants to burst open fully into what you are, and for that it is kind of ready to do everything. That everything looks nice but I still want to take chance and see what happens. Because ultimately what is happening, is meeting, is just meeting happening. Essentially there is nothing, nothing really being said or nothing being understood actually, fundamentally. All that is happening is just part of preparing, you are preparing yourself in a way to face the Truth of your Self inside you. The face, the Truth of this moment.

In a normal sense, you are the student, I am the teacher and I, the teacher, will continue trying to help you. You, the student, will try to take the help. But in a deeper sense, when you are open to face this Truth, I am your Truth, you are my Truth. You are my Truth beyond my-ness here. I am your Truth beyond your my-ness there. And if you face this Truth, that sense of my-ness, that hypnosis of my-ness breaks actually. This is the value of meeting also, no? So not what I am saying is important right now when you have come like this, I am important for you right now. My existence here has to be acknowledged by you right now as much as you can, which cannot be fully acknowledged by you in the ‘my’ state or this state of my-ness, I-ness. If you are encouraged to acknowledge my existence then you have to break out of this climate of I, my. And then as you are acknowledging what remains? ‘This’, which is not mine, which is not yours, and sense of mine in you and in me maybe belongs to ‘This’, arises from ‘This’, arises in ‘This’, lived by ‘This’. There is nobody else here which needs to be free from ego. Nobody else beloved, there is always Truth, which is living as This, sometime as limitation, sometime as This. Its own decision. No job given to anyone here to do anything particularly.

(Excerpts from Focus Group, 26th July, 2018)

A feeling to Dissolve

Questioner – Bhaiya, I have a feeling to dissolve.

Rajee – You have feeling to dissolve. Ah! How nice. 
This feeling to dissolve is very beautiful and deep feeling, no? And yet this feeling to dissolve dissolves in front of you, inside you, leaving the pure space which does not need to be claimed or achieved by you because you are it. So don’t do anything about it. It is a very deep desire and it’s very fiery also. Feeling to dissolve cannot serve the ego, cannot help the ego to become stronger or thick, but it also cannot help the Truth in any way, so it cannot help you become more what you are already. So don’t entertain this but also don’t fight with it. It is like a fire, automatic fireworks going on inside you. You just let it be the way it is. It is a part of the process and it is the fire that is going on inside you that, ‘I feel like dissolving’. Who feels like dissolving? The space? The sky that you are inside you? How it can dissolve? into what? So this feeling to dissolve, let it dissolve. It will dissolve by itself. This feeling to dissolve is also containing that ‘I am there and I must dissolve before I can be my Self’. So this ‘feeling’ and this what is inside this feeling, ‘I’, both will dissolve by itself. You just stay in the fire of satsang here and in your Self. In your Self just stay as whatever you are now. Just don’t entertain it, don’t do anything about it. It is already undoing something inside you, which is the grace of life actually, Grace of God, that God has turned his face towards you, saying ‘Hello beloved, how are you?’ (smiles) So it’s a beautiful auspicious occasion in you, in your life.
What do you feel?

Questioner: Thank you, thank you Bhaiya.

(Excerpts from Online Focus Group, 26th July, 2018)

Two only most valuable things

Beloveds, in this whole show, in this whole activity of teacher and student combination, teaching, satsang, instructions, following the instructions, pointing, following the pointing, darshan, meeting, there are only two things which are most valuable, everything else is kind of gradually changing and need to change and will change. The most valuable thing that is You and Me. These are the two only most valuable things and these are the only two Truths here, which are not two, but it’s alright to keep, feel it like two right now. These are the two only most valuable things here – You and Me. Not what you say, not what you do, not what I say, not what I do. The sooner you understand this the better. Because then we can have a real meeting, awakening meeting, a meeting which is enlightening meeting. Not that you are trying to fix things. When you are trying to fix things what are you doing exactly? Are you not trying to fix things of the ego? If you may allow me to say like this, You are trying to fix things or the problems of the ego, not the problem called ego, which creates all the problem by the way.

True knowledge happens in the depth, in the presence of your own Self. So you just stay in the presence and let everything happen, all the knowledge, all the true knowledge and experiencing take place. This is the best thing one can understand at the mind level that I cannot understand anything which can give me juice of life, which can give me happiness and excitement. And then you find someone, some situation, some teacher, teaching, some satsang or some technique also sometime to find that thing where you really understand something like, ‘Is there any place inside me where I can understand something Truly, not like in the mind level?’. At the mind level everything can be challenged. Everything that you understand can be challenged, it is just that the figure which is challenging has to be bigger than you energetically, which can create doubt in you, that ‘Are you sure you understand this?’, and you feel like, ‘Oh, ya I don’t know really’. But what you feel inside cannot be challenged because there is nobody separate inside, in the knowing of life, in the knowing of the being. The being and the knowing is one and the same thing, just like water. Like it’s like oceanic being inside you knowing itself and everything else in relation to that, you know, it’s like this, not the knowledge of the mind that ‘OK, this is the knowledge of the mind’, ‘So when did you know this?’, ‘I think yesterday I did come to know about it.’ So this yesterday means separate. And when you are asked, questioned about knowing, ‘So when did you know this?’, you say, ‘I don’t know when but I’m knowing it right now. I don’t know about when, but I’m knowing it right now.’ And will you know it tomorrow? ‘I don’t know. I will only know tomorrow when it will be there like this or not.’ And like this slowly you kind of move from the mind to the heart. This heart is this being, this ocean-like being inside you, like a space-like being inside you, when being and knowing is one and the same thing. So whether you are your Self or you are knowing your Self is one and the same thing. Then slowly some deeper knowledge takes place, knowledge of the Seer, the acknowledgement of the Seer that, ‘Hey! There is a Seer also!’ which is seeing everything.
So it’s fine, enjoy.

(Excerpts from Online Focus Group, 26th July, 2018)